How to Not Go Nuts While Trying to Conceive

It should be fun trying to get pregnant when you’re ready for it, right? But experience has shown that those days of excitement and happiness can slowly become one of doubt and frustration. 

Some couples have reported assuming they’ll get pregnant within six months of trying. And for most of these couples, it’s a huge disappointment when they think they’ll just lie back and start prepping for the baby and then the woman’s period shows up​. And if this persists beyond the sixth month, it becomes hard to keep hoping. If you’re experiencing this, you might find that you’re starting to become hysteric.​

​If this is you, please don’t panic. While some things might not be in your control, there are things you could do to get things right. Even if you’ve used different strategies, calendar method, ovulation predictor kits or fertility monitors, or charting, there’s still a chance that you missed something. In fact, 25% of couples can take anywhere between 2 and 7 months even when they were timing things exactly right.​ 

This said, if there’s anything that won’t help you now, it’s getting stressed out. Think how stress can negatively impact fertility.​ You can choose the smarter way and do what you can now to prepare your body for pregnancy.

1. Give Yourself Time

​You need to prepare your mind that you won’t get pregnant right away, i.e., if you’re just starting your trying to conceive journey. Give yourself one year to conceive naturally if you’re less than 30​ years or six months​ if you’re older. 

If you were on hormonal birth control, give your body a few months for it to start ovulating on its own. Remember that some hormonal birth control methods have a long action duration and can affect your reproductive system for at least three months after you stop taking them​.

By setting a realistic time, you are certainly going to be less hearbreaking when that first period shows up.

2. Keep Track of Your Cycles

​If you weren’t doing it, you should get to work. If you were keeping track of your cycles, make sure you pinpoint your best time for intercourse. Since there is only a six-day fertile window (five days before ovulation and the day of ovulation itself) during every menstrual cycle, it is possible that some women do not time things right. 

The video below describes the changes that occur during the menstrual cycle and when it’s best to have intercourse.

If you haven’t tried them yet, there are many tools that can help you track your cycles, ranging from free apps that you can plug in your menstrual dates to more complex devices such as fertility monitors that can store and analyze your data and inform you of the best days to have intercourse.

If you choose to use standard ovulation predictor kits, you can use use the method (Tip 1) described in this post to keep tract of your fertile periods. 

3. Take Care of Yourself

​Don’t deprive yourself from the little pleasures of life. Curling up at home and refusing to hangout with other couples for fear of being reminded that you haven’t conceive yet won’t help you at all. If you can’t handle people, you can still go out with your partner, take long and quiet walks, or simply enjoy a romantic dinner together.

If you like to play sports, keep up with your weekly or monthly activity. Just don’t stop doing what you love because you’re stressed out by the whole baby-making process and if you can’t manage it, check out the nearest yoga class around you and register.

4. Adopt Lifestyle Changes That Can Help You on Your Trying to Conceive Journey

If you were smoking, you should know by know that you should ditch the cigarette. While a glass of wine on a special occasion might not kill, there is evidence that alcohol use is associated with multiple reproductive risks,​ including having a baby with a fetal alcohol spectrum disorder, increased risk of miscarriage, and reduced likelihood of having a live birth. 

This post describes more about lifestyle changes that you should consider when trying to conceive.

5. Take a Prenatal Vitamin That Contains Folic Acid

It is essential that you take a prenatal vitamin with the recommended 400 µg ​of folic acid before and during pregnancy to help prevent congenital malformations such as spina bifida (where the baby’s backbone and membranes around the spinal cord do not close completely).​ 

You might wonder why you should start taking folic acid even before conception? Since birth defects typically occur during the first three to four weels of pregnancy, it’s necessary that you have folic acid in your body during the early stages of pregnancy when your fetus’ brain and spinal cord are developing.​

6. Talk to Your Obstetrician

It is pointless trying to research every trying to conceive tip that a well-meaning friend or relative suggests. If you won’t be able to handle it, call your health care provider and book a preconception counseling appoitment. Your doctor will check for any medical issues you may have before you get pregnant. ​In addition, you will be able to discuss any issues that you’re about with your doctor, including your diet, prenatal vitamins, or any health problems in your family.​


Although it might sound simple, getting pregnant can be overwhelmingly frustrating. No matter how stressful the process may be for you, there are some factors that you can control: keeping calm and preparing your body for pregnancy. As terrifying as it may sound to some, the bottom line is that you can choose to get stressed and not achieve much or worry smarter and make choices that will help you improve your chances of conception.​ 


I’m Princila, founder of Check Ovulation and a proud mom of two. I’m an alumna of James Lind Institute. After working in clinical jobs, my passion for writing took its toll, and I ended up switching careers to work in the medical publishing industry. I also have a passion for healthy food, which prompted me to take several online courses in nutrition and health offered by Wageningen University. (I still haven’t completed the courses thanks to my busy mommy schedule!). When I’m not writing/editing scientific and medical manuscripts or taking care of my family, I use my free time to research, learn, and write about healthy living. I have also authored a few books in the self-help niche using the pen names Princila Murrell or PN Murray. Protection Status